4 little known facts about marriage

 What started in the ancient times, as a way to keep the agricultural lands intact within certain groups and ensure social and economic stability, marriage today has acquired a wholly new meaning. During the agricultural economy, marriage was between two families decided by elders, with absolutely no say for the young boy and girl involved.

Interestingly, to keep alliances and the wealth within the family, those days most marriages were between second cousins and third cousins. At times, it was not uncommon for the brother to marry a widowed sister in law. It was a normal thing those days. Polygamy was widely prevalent until later some kings ensured monogamy by decree.

As the institution evolved, the religious powers (Churches, temples, mosques) began to play a key role in marriage with a view that the man-woman relationship had to be sanctioned by God.

Things changed further when the agricultural economy moved to the industrial economy. It was then that people could find jobs on their own away from family lands and that new empowerment changed relationships forever.

The young men and women now had the power to make their decisions independently. That was the start of “love marriages”. But it wasn’t until 50 years ago that women started getting equal rights.

Today men and women have equal rights to choose their partners, although in many countries families still play a major role in marriage.

Rajasekar KS

Read a chapter - the inner mind of husbands

 

Here's a book that reveals the "inner mind" of husbands.

I’m happily married for 25 years now. I truly believe that the wife-husband relationship is a beautiful one that everyone should be blessed with. The way a man thinks is completely different to a woman’s inner mind. That’s what makes a couple’s relationship exciting, intriguing and sometimes challenging.

 My book is a guide for married women to understand how the husband thinks and responds. I hope this book offers you a “new understanding” and helps improve your relationship with your partner. I appreciate your time and effort in reading this book. 

Read the sample chapter here

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1KQo2j6zXuQ5_SVFnTr7SdKB0daGC8UVJ/view?usp=sharing

Reach me at positivemantra@gmail.com

Home, office, classroom or salon?

The home has changed a lot these days, courtesy the pandemic. Sometime it's an office where the man and woman are on zoom meetings or frantically walk around taking office calls, at other times it's a classroom with children answering the teachers or displaying their projects. Suddenly, it becomes a beauty parlour when ladies bring out their creams, lipsticks, perfumes et all. Not just that, it also turns into a saloon when the wife grudgingly snips the overgrown hair of the husband. On weekends, it turns into gym or sometimes a dance class.

Everyday the home seems getting crazier than before with phones, laptops and TV blaring different sounds. As it gets smaller, every little space is being used - the kids fire up their laptops and take the balcony or the staircase and the pets find their comfort in whatever temporary space is available.

The lack of outdoor activities and the reluctance to invite friends or relatives has further pushed pushed people's mental well-being to the corner.

People at home are getting shoved from one room to the other as these transformations happen. And the whole family lives on the edge battling frayed nerves as the space turns small and begins to choke all at home.

To solve the space issue, some have moved to bigger homes on the city's outskirts as the rents have nosedived with the IT sector choosing to work from  home and workers moving to their native.

As I change the background settings of my zoom and adjust the photos on the wall behind, to gear up for a meeting with an agency, I wonder if pandemic will have a lasting impact on our family and relationships.

Rajasekar KS writes about culture, relationships and technology. He can be reached at positivemantra@gmail.com

How to Read Your Husband Like a Book: The perfect gift for newly married women

My book has been launched on Amazon, read more Buy How to Read Your Husband Like a Book Book Online at Low Prices in India | How to Read Your Husband Like a Book Reviews & Ratings - Amazon.in

In a world where the husband-wife relationship is good fodder for stand-up comedy, this easy-to-read book offers fresh insight into the inner workings of a “husband’s mind”.

Through humorous nuggets and simple illustrations, this book explains how a husband ‘thinks’, what makes him ‘respond’ the way he does, his ‘reaction’ to certain situations that crop up in married life and what a wife can do to avoid friction and get her own way.

So, all newly married women out there and even those who've been married for years and losing hair thinking about why they forget your birthday, leave wet towels on the bed, don't notice your new hair style, watch TV when you talk to them – pick up this book and laugh your way through marriage! Husbands, it's time to laugh at yourselves!

Rajasekar KS

How pandemic is hurting the husband-wife relationship

Most talk during the pandemic has centred around loss of jobs, Covid symptoms, hand washing and social distancing, unfortunately little has been spoken about the couple’s relationship which has suffered the most. The pandemic has in fact boxed the wife and husband into a tight corner.

With the work from home scenario, suddenly the couple has been forced to stay together the whole day. Nobody wanted it and nobody wants it, that way. While initially, it seemed to work wonders being around together more often than before, watching movies on OTT, playing board games, browsing through the photo albums together, soon it turned into a nightmare.

While the husbands were earlier quietly enjoying the day time break being away from home and at office, the women who relished the “Me Time” have begun to feel suffocated with the man being around at home, all the time. Think about the working women, she is harassed for time everyday with home, inlaws, husband, kids and household chores. No gym, no walking and not much time for herself. The pent up feelings and piling office work is beginning to hurt their mental and physical well being.

The healthy space between the two has vanished and quarrels and abuse have become common. Imagine being quarantined without having Covid, that’s exactly how most women have been feeling during the pandemic. The online classes haven’t helped either with kids occupying the bedroom and demanding something to eat every one hour.

Help for household chores is a daily bother with excuses of office call, online class etc being thrown in.

Unless the men understand what their spouse is going through and support them; and together with the children do 50:50 in household chores and relinquish their rooms now and then for women; and private and government come together to set up some support systems, the pandemic will leave a psychological scar on the wife-husband relationship forever.

In the meantime, the helplines and phone lines of counsellors are buzzing with calls from married women.

Rajasekar KS, Author of the upcoming book How to Read Your Husband Like a Book. He can be reached at positivemantra@gmail.com

If I know what love is, it's because of you

 

When your husband stands by you, you can take on the world. That's the power of love!

About Author

 

Award-winning marketer, speaker and writer, Rajasekar KS has been happily married for 25 years. For the last eight years, he’s been in the matchmaking industry with the Indian online matrimony leader, BharatMatrimony, where he spearheaded projects, including the launch of ‘happymarriages.com, India’s guide to a happy marriage’, the ‘Happy Marriage Workshops’ attended by over 30,000 people and a ‘Happy Couples’ program that included over a 1500 interviews with newly married couples. 

He has been recognised among India’s Powerful Influencers 2020 by Adgully, listed in Top Content Professionals by Adobe & Paul Writer (2017 & 2018), recognised by Express Writers USA in the Top 100 Content Marketers, and ranked among the top 50 marketers in India by the World Marketing Congress. He speaks on culture, content marketing, social media and technology at various forums including Internet and Mobile Association of India, Exchange4Media, IFMR and social media summits. Occasionally, he has written for the online edition of Economic Times (Tech), Business World and Business Line.

Reach him at positivemantra@gmail.com

Husbands love to fix problems - couple issues

 

World's best quotes for husband

 Top love, gratitude quotes for your husband. Share on Whatsapp, Instagram, Facebook or send your husband a text..

via GIPHY

#1 My heart is where my husband is.

#2 There isn’t one person in the world that I want more than I want you.

#3 A hundred hearts would be too few to carry all my love for you.

#4 Your love has strengthened me in weak moments and I am here to do the same for you.

#5 In all the world, there is no heart for me like yours. In all the world, there is no love for you like mine.

#6 My husband is one of the greatest gifts from God, His love is a gift I open every day.

#7 I know a thing or two about love, and it is only because of you.

#8 Thank you for always being there for me when I need you.

#9 You've made me laugh when I was sad, picked me up when I was down, and cheered me on through difficult journeys. I am eternally grateful to have such a special man in my life. I love you.

#10 A good husband makes a good life.

#11 A husband is the best friend who walks into your life when the world has walked out.

#12 My husband is where my love story begins.

#13 Nothing says “home” like the arms of my husband.

#14 In good and bad times, I want to be the hand you hold.

#15 That’s what a good husband does, keeps your dreams alive even when you don’t believe anymore.

#16 Making me feel special and loved is the best feeling, and I will try my best to be worthy of you and your love.

#17 Choosing to spend the rest of my life with you is the best choice I have made in my life. You are my refuge, my comfort, and, my happiness. There is nothing more I wanted in this life! I love you hubby.

#18 I need to start the morning with it and end the day with it. It’s not coffee but my husband’s kiss. I love you.

#19 Our love continues to grow even after all these years, and that is amazing.

#20 In a world full of chaos and confusion, you are the only thing that makes perfect sense to me.

#21 My husband is my world.

#22 You took my breath away when we first met, and today you still leave me breathless every day!

#23 I have found the one whom my soul loves.

#24 I ask myself every day. How did I get so lucky to marry my best friend in this world?

#25 I did not marry a protector and a provider. I married my best friend, my most trusted confidant and the man I love. You are all these things and more.

#26 You make me complete because I didn’t know what love meant until I met you my better half

#27 You are always the reason for my happiness, my world and the love of my life.

#28 I fall in love with you every time I see you.

#29 You are the butter to my bread, and the breath to my life.

#30 My husband is my happy place.

#31 To love my husband is the greatest gift I've ever received.

#32 It was love at first sight. It was love at the hundredth sight and the thousandth sight too. True love is falling in love with the same person over and over again. You are my true love.

#33 Let the wife make the husband glad to come home, and let him make her sorry to see him leave.

#34 If I know what love is, it is because of you.

#35 You are a warm cup of coffee on a rainy morning, a soft blanket on a cold night, the rainbow following a storm and the sauna at the end of a difficult week. You are the love, passion, and comfort of my life.

#36 Our life isn’t perfect, but I am so thankful for you. For your love, respect, and all that you do, I am grateful for.

#37 Being in love with you makes every morning worth getting up for.

#38 True soul mates are together forever. I am ready to stay beside you, my true friend and partner.

#39 I really care about you, your happiness matters to me than mine.

#40 When I needed you, god sent you.

Curated by Rajasekar KS

Stop Thinking about Small Things, Start Thinking about the Important Things

 

Do you think about small things in the relationship?

Why they keep the toothpaste cap open, can't put the things back in the proper place in the kitchen, forget to turn the tap off sometimes or come home late for dinner.

If you focus on little things like these, the relationship is heading for trouble.

The objective of marriage is happiness, peace, progressing together and care for all at home.

Think Big.

Focus on the positive and the quarrels fall by the wayside. How to expand your resources to buy a new home. How to plan your child's education at a good college. How much to save for that family vacation to Hawaii. What's the plan for the anniversary. What are the things to work on to get the promotion next year. How to become more confident and fit by exercising every day.

When you focus on the big and important things in life, the small things get resolved quickly.

Think Big. Think positive.