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Thursday, October 14, 2021

4 little known facts about marriage

 What started in the ancient times, as a way to keep the agricultural lands intact within certain groups and ensure social and economic stability, marriage today has acquired a wholly new meaning. During the agricultural economy, marriage was between two families decided by elders, with absolutely no say for the young boy and girl involved.

Interestingly, to keep alliances and the wealth within the family, those days most marriages were between second cousins and third cousins. At times, it was not uncommon for the brother to marry a widowed sister in law. It was a normal thing those days. Polygamy was widely prevalent until later some kings ensured monogamy by decree.

As the institution evolved, the religious powers (Churches, temples, mosques) began to play a key role in marriage with a view that the man-woman relationship had to be sanctioned by God.

Things changed further when the agricultural economy moved to the industrial economy. It was then that people could find jobs on their own away from family lands and that new empowerment changed relationships forever.

The young men and women now had the power to make their decisions independently. That was the start of “love marriages”. But it wasn’t until 50 years ago that women started getting equal rights.

Today men and women have equal rights to choose their partners, although in many countries families still play a major role in marriage.

Rajasekar KS

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Friday, October 8, 2021

Read a chapter - the inner mind of husbands

 

Here's a book that reveals the "inner mind" of husbands.

I’m happily married for 25 years now. I truly believe that the wife-husband relationship is a beautiful one that everyone should be blessed with. The way a man thinks is completely different to a woman’s inner mind. That’s what makes a couple’s relationship exciting, intriguing and sometimes challenging.

 My book is a guide for married women to understand how the husband thinks and responds. I hope this book offers you a “new understanding” and helps improve your relationship with your partner. I appreciate your time and effort in reading this book. 

Read the sample chapter here

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1KQo2j6zXuQ5_SVFnTr7SdKB0daGC8UVJ/view?usp=sharing

Reach me at positivemantra@gmail.com

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Thursday, September 30, 2021

Home, office, classroom or salon?



The home has changed a lot these days, courtesy the pandemic. Sometime it's an office where the man and woman are on zoom meetings or frantically walk around taking office calls, at other times it's a classroom with children answering the teachers or displaying their projects. Suddenly, it becomes a beauty parlour when ladies bring out their creams, lipsticks, perfumes et all. Not just that, it also turns into a saloon when the wife grudgingly snips the overgrown hair of the husband. On weekends, it turns into gym or sometimes a dance class.

Everyday the home seems getting crazier than before with phones, laptops and TV blaring different sounds. As it gets smaller, every little space is being used - the kids fire up their laptops and take the balcony or the staircase and the pets find their comfort in whatever temporary space is available.

The lack of outdoor activities and the reluctance to invite friends or relatives has further pushed pushed people's mental well-being to the corner.

People at home are getting shoved from one room to the other as these transformations happen. And the whole family lives on the edge battling frayed nerves as the space turns small and begins to choke all at home.

To solve the space issue, some have moved to bigger homes on the city's outskirts as the rents have nosedived with the IT sector choosing to work from  home and workers moving to their native.

As I change the background settings of my zoom and adjust the photos on the wall behind, to gear up for a meeting with an agency, I wonder if pandemic will have a lasting impact on our family and relationships.

Rajasekar KS writes about culture, relationships and technology. He can be reached at positivemantra@gmail.com
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Thursday, September 23, 2021

How to Read Your Husband Like a Book: The perfect gift for newly married women


My book has been launched on Amazon, read more Buy How to Read Your Husband Like a Book Book Online at Low Prices in India | How to Read Your Husband Like a Book Reviews & Ratings - Amazon.in

In a world where the husband-wife relationship is good fodder for stand-up comedy, this easy-to-read book offers fresh insight into the inner workings of a “husband’s mind”.

Through humorous nuggets and simple illustrations, this book explains how a husband ‘thinks’, what makes him ‘respond’ the way he does, his ‘reaction’ to certain situations that crop up in married life and what a wife can do to avoid friction and get her own way.

So, all newly married women out there and even those who've been married for years and losing hair thinking about why they forget your birthday, leave wet towels on the bed, don't notice your new hair style, watch TV when you talk to them – pick up this book and laugh your way through marriage! Husbands, it's time to laugh at yourselves!

Rajasekar KS

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Sunday, September 19, 2021

How pandemic is hurting the husband-wife relationship

Most talk during the pandemic has centred around loss of jobs, Covid symptoms, hand washing and social distancing, unfortunately little has been spoken about the couple’s relationship which has suffered the most. The pandemic has in fact boxed the wife and husband into a tight corner.

With the work from home scenario, suddenly the couple has been forced to stay together the whole day. Nobody wanted it and nobody wants it, that way. While initially, it seemed to work wonders being around together more often than before, watching movies on OTT, playing board games, browsing through the photo albums together, soon it turned into a nightmare.

While the husbands were earlier quietly enjoying the day time break being away from home and at office, the women who relished the “Me Time” have begun to feel suffocated with the man being around at home, all the time. Think about the working women, she is harassed for time everyday with home, inlaws, husband, kids and household chores. No gym, no walking and not much time for herself. The pent up feelings and piling office work is beginning to hurt their mental and physical well being.

The healthy space between the two has vanished and quarrels and abuse have become common. Imagine being quarantined without having Covid, that’s exactly how most women have been feeling during the pandemic. The online classes haven’t helped either with kids occupying the bedroom and demanding something to eat every one hour.

Help for household chores is a daily bother with excuses of office call, online class etc being thrown in.

Unless the men understand what their spouse is going through and support them; and together with the children do 50:50 in household chores and relinquish their rooms now and then for women; and private and government come together to set up some support systems, the pandemic will leave a psychological scar on the wife-husband relationship forever.

In the meantime, the helplines and phone lines of counsellors are buzzing with calls from married women.

Rajasekar KS, Author of the upcoming book How to Read Your Husband Like a Book. He can be reached at positivemantra@gmail.com

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Saturday, September 18, 2021

If I know what love is, it's because of you


 

When your husband stands by you, you can take on the world. That's the power of love!

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Saturday, September 11, 2021

About Author

 

Award-winning marketer, speaker and writer, Rajasekar KS has been happily married for 25 years. For the last eight years, he’s been in the matchmaking industry with the Indian online matrimony leader, BharatMatrimony, where he spearheaded projects, including the launch of ‘happymarriages.com, India’s guide to a happy marriage’, the ‘Happy Marriage Workshops’ attended by over 30,000 people and a ‘Happy Couples’ program that included over a 1500 interviews with newly married couples. 

He has been recognised among India’s Powerful Influencers 2020 by Adgully, listed in Top Content Professionals by Adobe & Paul Writer (2017 & 2018), recognised by Express Writers USA in the Top 100 Content Marketers, and ranked among the top 50 marketers in India by the World Marketing Congress. He speaks on culture, content marketing, social media and technology at various forums including Internet and Mobile Association of India, Exchange4Media, IFMR and social media summits. Occasionally, he has written for the online edition of Economic Times (Tech), Business World and Business Line.

Reach him at positivemantra@gmail.com

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